[ENDED] Madja's 11th Raffle - April Fool's Edition

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Re: Madja's 11th Raffle - April Fool's Edition [Any Region]

Post by Paladance » April 2nd, 2016, 7:56 am

Glad to see so many people here! :)

This text is a rewritten classic joke, put the first time in the Gnome-related thread, hence that little faction inconsistence.
Let's assume that being a part of Gadgetzan gives you a lot of unexpected knowledge!
A tauren, an orc and a gnome who had met in Gadgetzan were wandering through sands of Tanaris. Close to Zul'Farrak's site they found an old olive lamp with mysterious ornaments.
The orc's leg started being itchy, so he took the lamp and used it as a tool to scratch the leg…
After that, there appeared a genie who said to the walkers:

-- You have released me, so I shall fulfill your three wishes, one per person.
-- I so like the Mulgore… -- said the tauren. -- Let its meadows be always green and lush with fresh dew every morning.
-- It seems to be boring, but you will get it. Next one.
-- Encircle the Orgrimmar with great, strong wall to separate the city from undisciplined bushwhackers and annoying troll chickens! -- said the orc.
-- Done. And you, my little friend?
-- This isn't my exact wish, but please tell me something more about those Orgri's fortifications.
-- They are around the whole city, reach higher that the zeppelin towers and are so durable and consistent that even a worm would not pass through them.
-- So pour the Undercity goo inside them until it reaches their full height!
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Re: Madja's 11th Raffle - April Fool's Edition [Any Region]

Post by Sunborne » April 2nd, 2016, 8:41 am

What does a Kobold and a Paladin have in common? They carry The Light with them.

*Just entering for fun*

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Re: Madja's 11th Raffle - April Fool's Edition [Any Region]

Post by Antaeus » April 2nd, 2016, 10:53 am

This is definitely my original joke :P - I put another player on /ignore but he still speaks to me at work, is the ignore system broken?

Also already have the pet just wanted to share.

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Re: Madja's 11th Raffle - April Fool's Edition [Any Region]

Post by Sikoya » April 2nd, 2016, 1:23 pm

(translated from German)

How do you know you've been playing WoW for too long?

Your weeks begin on Wednesday.

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Re: Madja's 11th Raffle - April Fool's Edition [Any Region]

Post by Faolin » April 2nd, 2016, 7:10 pm

What do you call a group of Paladins refusing to work and demanding better working conditions?

A Crusader Strike



xD

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Re: Madja's 11th Raffle - April Fool's Edition [Any Region]

Post by Deviantelf » April 3rd, 2016, 1:59 am

How do you know you play too much WoW?
-When your girlfriend's pants have a low drop rate.

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Re: Madja's 11th Raffle - April Fool's Edition [Any Region]

Post by Shingetsu » April 3rd, 2016, 12:39 pm

I'm terrible at telling jokes so I googled one instead:

Q: What do you call 5 mogu rolling down the hill?
A: The Rolling Stones!

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Re: Madja's 11th Raffle - April Fool's Edition [Any Region]

Post by Vakeetah » April 3rd, 2016, 6:00 pm

This one is a cross-reference pun...

- Why did Kael'thas come back to life?
- Because he had a Phoenix Down!
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Re: Madja's 11th Raffle - April Fool's Edition [Any Region]

Post by Ken68m » April 3rd, 2016, 6:37 pm

I know there are /joke emotes and seen some but never knew there was such a variety of jokes until I found this one: http://wowwiki.wikia.com/wiki/Jokes

I am going to log on and try this on my female dwarf so see if it really works...


"No they're not real, but thanks for noticing."


"I give myself a Dutch oven pedicure every night. I've got no foot fungus at all. My toes are pristine."

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Re: Madja's 11th Raffle - April Fool's Edition [Any Region]

Post by Waflob » April 4th, 2016, 2:35 am

What do noobs and rogues have in common?

They both pick locks ^^

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Re: Madja's 11th Raffle - April Fool's Edition [Any Region]

Post by Madja » April 4th, 2016, 6:13 am

Waflob wrote:What do noobs and rogues have in common?

They both pick locks ^^

Ooooh! Shots fired!! ;)


Great jokes everyone! So much fun to read them :D
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Re: Madja's 11th Raffle - April Fool's Edition [Any Region]

Post by Yazhi » April 4th, 2016, 2:17 pm

Commenting just for fun here again, but this old one always made me laugh to those of you who've felt my pain...

Q: How many rogues does it take to kill a paladin?

A: 2. One to attack and one to wait at the inn.

Good ol' bubble hearth used to be a pain in the butt! xD

Oh and this one too:

Q:What do you call a resto druid in brawlers guild?

A: A combat log ^^


There's this one from a GM too that makes me giggle:

A rough and tough veteran Tauren Warrior walks into an inn. He's a scary looking customer, grizzled, scarred and mean as a bag of ravagers. His hooves thunder on the floor boards as he swaggers up to the bar and orders a drink. The rest of the patrons are silent, petrified with fear. He finishes his drink, then goes outside to leave. He returns moments later, sweeps every patron of the inn with his steely gaze, cracks his massive knuckles, and in a low, dangerous voice utters, "I'm going to sit down and have another drink. If my Kodo isn't back where I left it by the time I'm done, I'm going to have to do what I did back in the Barrens. And I really don't want have to do what I did back in the Barrens."

He sits down, and orders another drink. In time he finishes his second drink, gets up, and stalks to the door to check outside. Lo and behold, his Kodo is sitting contentedly next to the Stablemaster, right where it belongs. A satisfied sneer on his face, the Warrior prepares to leave, but before he departs the Blood Elf that was tending bar timidlly asks, "Um, mister Warrior? What did you have to do back in the Barrens?"

The grizzled veteran gets a sad, far-off look in his eyes, and rumbles "I had to walk home."

Good luck as always everyone!

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Re: Madja's 11th Raffle - April Fool's Edition [Any Region]

Post by Paladance » April 4th, 2016, 3:10 pm

Seeing that I could be overwhelming a bit I'll put two strange shorts for fun too:

1. Q: Why a rogue went on a date with a resto druid?
A: Because they don't mind experience of the sap! :roll:
2. Think about it: the Forsaken hunters should definitely be the best ones when it comes to feigning death.

@Azaelia weee, another classic! :D I have a feeling that they make the universe more alive. ;)
Completing recently the Tillers reputation, I've seen a book in Pandaria with another classic story put into the world.
There are more, but not all related to jokes. ;)
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Re: Madja's 11th Raffle - April Fool's Edition [Any Region]

Post by Manofmoo » April 4th, 2016, 3:26 pm

How are Death Knights similar to prostitutes?

They are cheap, easy, and spread diseases. ;)

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Re: Madja's 11th Raffle - April Fool's Edition [Any Region]

Post by Hushpad » April 5th, 2016, 12:30 am

Q: How many rogues does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: One to actually screw in the lightbulb, and 999 on the forums claiming they could've done it better.

Q: What do you call a gnome mage?
A: Minibar.

Why do hardcore raiders smell? -Because they never wipe!

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Re: Madja's 11th Raffle - April Fool's Edition [Any Region]

Post by Shlemm » April 5th, 2016, 3:34 am

A gnome was about to cross the road when a chicken came running to him shouting: "No no no, don't do it!"
The gnome asked why. The chicken said: "You will never hear the last of it."

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Re: Madja's 11th Raffle - April Fool's Edition [Any Region]

Post by Darolyn » April 5th, 2016, 11:02 am

I'm trying to remember the last GM joke I heard when I put in a ticket.

It went something like "Why is there no cheese in Mulgore" "Because Tauren Lactose" Except I'm not 100% sure I remembered it right...shoulda screen-shotted it.

Google hasn't helped me find it yet....

Okay, I have to share this one that I just found. What do you call a gnome mage that escaped from Violet Hold?


A small medium at large.

Or....

"GM, tell me a joke?"

"All mine are really bad...I keep practicing them on my gnome friend, but they just go over his head"

And one more, because I'm still trying to find the Mulgore one...

A rough and tough veteran Tauren Warrior walks into an inn. He's a scary looking customer, grizzled, scarred and mean as a bag of ravagers. His hooves thunder on the floor boards as he swaggers up to the bar and orders a drink. The rest of the patrons are silent, petrified with fear. He finishes his drink, then goes outside to leave. He returns moments later, sweeps every patron of the inn with his steely gaze, cracks his massive knuckles, and in a low, dangerous voice utters, "I'm going to sit down and have another drink. If my Kodo isn't back where I left it by the time I'm done, I'm going to have to do what I did back in the Barrens. And I really don't want have to do what I did back in the Barrens."

He sits down, and orders another drink. In time he finishes his second drink, gets up, and stalks to the door to check outside. Lo and behold, his Kodo is sitting contentedly next to the Stablemaster, right where it belongs. A satisfied sneer on his face, the Warrior prepares to leave, but before he departs the Blood Elf that was tending bar timidlly asks, "Um, mister Warrior? What did you have to do back in the Barrens?"

The grizzled veteran gets a sad, far-off look in his eyes, and rumbles "I had to walk home."
Thaliana#1794 - My WoW account has 50 toons, so I would so greatly appreciate people creating toons on Kael'Thas or Ghostlands to trade with me. <3

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Re: Madja's 11th Raffle - April Fool's Edition [Any Region]

Post by Africanleopard » April 5th, 2016, 12:31 pm

Shamelessly poached off the net, but it speaks to me as my main is a druid....

How many worgen do you need to get a cat into a tree?

Three. One to be the worgen, one to be the cat and one to be the tree.

This is real life but quite funny - my friend and I zoned into a dungeon - she plays boomie and I play feral. And lo, we were an all druid 5 man group - another feral, a tree and a bear. That was the most fun I ever had in a dungeon - LOL. Druid for the win :lol:

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Re: Madja's 11th Raffle - April Fool's Edition [Any Region]

Post by Etta » April 5th, 2016, 6:21 pm

I got this one from a GM...more of a statement than a joke/riddle.

Be careful, I rode through Booty Bay the other day and I saw a sign that said "Watch for Murlocs". That turned out to be the worst trade in my life. Now I don't know what time it is!

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Re: Madja's 11th Raffle - April Fool's Edition [Any Region]

Post by Tlachtga » April 7th, 2016, 1:01 am

How do you know if you've been playing too much WoW?
When you pass by a cop car on he highway and say "%^&*....Did i aggro it?"

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